They told me if I ever saw my doppelgänger I would die soon after.
I saw mine yesterday.
I was headed to the Gulf of Mexico. I was eating sunflower seeds and listening to Bon Iver. I had almost made it to the island where I would fish for the week. But before I reached the island I saw him, or me, or whoever it was. A car passed me, as they all do when you drive the speed limit. And I would have sworn I saw myself looking at me. I was reading its lips. It said, "You will die if you don't wake up."
It frightened me so much that I tried to catch up with the car, but it began violently weaving in and out of traffic. I could not keep up, blocked by a tractor-trailer. I obsessed over the face. Its look was full of scorn. Full of hate and anger. But awake. It was frightening, intimidating and beautiful at the same time.
Then I said to myself, "I am going to die tomorrow."
I fished the next day before dawn. I watched a sun rise from a sliver of lava-like light to a giant yellow beam in the sky. And I think a part of me died while I fished in the chest-high surf. Or I became the doppelgänger weaving in and out of traffic at 98 miles per hour. That was actually me, shedding my old skin like an anole when it doesn't have enough sunshine or humidity. And like the anole, I had been running up the walls, climbing them, and hiding myself in cracks and corners of existence.
But I guess that stopped after I became my doppelgänger. I guess that stopped in the chest-high surf.
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